Please do not read this if the description of feeling empty may trigger you.
Please take care of yourself, stay safe, and regularly share your feelings with someone trusted. It worked for me. I believe that it will work for you, and that someday you will feel better.
"I felt completely shut down & blank Saturday. I felt like a corpse observing what other people are thinking. With their eyes they say, 'She's SO depressed', 'She's getting worse.' They ask careful questions that try to make me laugh. This tells me that I must be looking pretty sick from the outside. These thoughts are added to the computer log in my head, emotionless, but noted."
"I feel like I'm a robot when I spend time with my cousin. I feel nothing, and she's so happy and excited and wants me to like her, to laugh with her. But it feels fake, and she deserves more than that. I wonder, if I wasn't shut down to begin with, if I would be able to be friends with her."
"Earlier I sat in my room literally just sitting, staring at the wall, thinking about how I would look to someone if they walked in. I think they would be worried."
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